I thought this was going to be easy. Long before I got my dress and bridesmaids in place, I envisioned a beach-themed wedding (in a wedding hall of course, because let’s be frank, the weather-gods will piss on you when they can). Beach theme is easy, just add some blue uplighting, throw a few decorative seashells on the tables, salt water taffy as favors, and done!
Reality turned out to be QUITE different.
It started with an innocent search on David’s Bridal. Having no idea what I wanted for me or the bridesmaids, I decided to scan around, getting a feel for the lay bride-landia when I clicked on an innocent-looking icon called “swatches”. The webpage opened up to a dizzying amount of swatches in a wide spectrum of colors that would rival a Pantone book. There was pink, light pink, blush, dark pink, magenta, fuchsia, then purple, royal purple, plum, eggplant. And then the blues, ice blue, royal blue. I’m sure you get the picture. Being enamored with all things color (as evidenced by my Pantone quip above) I quickly filled up my cart with every color that I fancied.
And these were just the ones I liked when they arrived. Everything else was blah, boring or just plain ugly. And because these options weren’t excessive enough, I decided I wanted TWO colors to complement each other for the wedding.
This is where it got crazy:
And it got worse. My combo choices changed daily, even hourly on some days. This went on for quite sometime. I was constantly shuffling swatches like one would if they had a nervous tick and a deck of cards.
At the brink of losing my sanity, I needed direction. I decided to consult Pinterest for ideas.
Along with ideas for color schemes, I also found myself needing the following:
A candy table AND a Viennese table AND a steam-punk decorated cake
A spray-painted white football, to wrap the garter around to toss to the groomsmen.
Giant DIY paper-mache flowers for the bridesmaids
Wooden coasters where guests would carve their marriage advice onto.
This new world very quickly became stressful and frightening and expensive and… oh wait, is that a RAINBOW WEDDING–GET OUT?!
It was a revelation, a whimsical wedding, because I AM whimsical. As a graphic artist, color was MY JAM and the whole non-matching thing would make things so easy! The bridesmaids can choose their own colors, the cake can be a cascading tower of unicorn poop (complete edible glitter, of course, because, hey it’s whimsical!), the favors can m&m’s, skittles, or heck, that colorful candy table I saw on Pinterest.
“…It’ll look like a gay wedding,” said my horrified fiancé.
I want to preface here that he’s in no way a homophobe. He was stating facts. Here in America, unless it’s a toddler’s birthday party, a wedding, complete with rainbows = gay.
I had to shelve the idea, not because of what people would think about me, but because it wouldn’t be fair to my guy with the gender-neutral sounding name. I’ll just have to get my color-rocks off somewhere else. Any ideas?